Remember the why

Welcome and well met back to the blog! I understand it’s been a while, but my life has been really chaotic these past few months.

I wanted to write this blog post from a thought I wrote down in my journal just now. I’ve recently been taking steps to achieve my creative goals, and I’ve been dealing with self-doubt and insecurity that made me almost forget why I create in the first place.

For one thing, I had a dilemma with determining where “I don’t feel ready” is no longer helpful. For example, I don’t feel ready to release my music because the audio software I’m using has a pretty steep learning curve, and I feel my work can be better if I learn more about the tools at my disposal. I think that’s reasonable. But not feeling ready because I’m scared to take the plunge and possibly face judgment from others? Where is that line ultimately drawn? I don’t know if that answer’s an easy one.

On top of that, I have observed that we as artists hear so much chatter about what’s popular and what’s not, and we sometimes wonder whether we even stand a chance. I imagine for a lot of people, that can be really discouraging. I know for my creative works, they are not mainstream so while I get to focus on a much narrower target audience, I also worry that my niche is so specific that I’ll go unnoticed forever. I don’t think that’s a healthy way to look at this.

One thing that helps me is to remember the “why”—why I’m actually doing this. While it would be nice to make my creativity into a career, the main driving force for all my endeavors is for self-expression. I’m doing this because I never saw what I wanted to read or listen to and thought, “Well, then, I’ll make my own!” This is why I write my stories and poetry. This is why I work towards my podcast. This is why I compose. I have worlds inside me that come out in my music and writing, and I create to share them with everyone.

I hope you enjoyed this blog post! If you want to share what helps you get through self-doubt, or have any questions, please let me know in the comments below! Thank you for reading!